I am stuck. Completely and utterly stuck. I feel like I'm lingering between the two things that I want in life.
I yearn to have more children. I look at my baby girl and think about having another one and another one and... well you get the point. Babies are awesome! I love cuddling my baby, nursing my baby, and wearing my baby. There's nothing better. For as long as I can remember, I have wanted a big family.
And while my heart yearns for more, my body and brain say five is enough. Maybe it's that my body is getting old and each pregnancy is getting harder, or maybe it's that I've been doing 'this' for 13 years, but I'm ready to go out to dinner without a highchair, I'm ready to go to the movies without a babysitter, and I'm ready to not carry a diaper bag.
I feel stuck.
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